Taming the Beast

Last month, as I mentioned in a previous post, my primary diagnosis was changed to RA.

Because my autoimmune symptoms had gotten significantly worse, we also started a much more aggressive course of treatment.

This course of treatment takes about three months to work if it's going to.

In the meantime, the plan was to continue my other meds and manage symptoms.

And I agreed with this plan.

What I didn't know was that, while we are waiting to see if the treatment is going to work, the disease process would explode this month.

Really.

I have tried not to be a complainer and have often taken this approach:

I now realize that people who care about me really want to know what is going on and they can't be supportive or check in or pray during this unpleasant time if I'm not forthcoming about the situation.

Also, I'm afraid it may seem like I'm being anti-social or unfriendly at times, when, in actuality, my body has just gone on strike.

So, now, for a report of what has really been going on since the start of chemo:

I have had nasty pain and stiffness in both of my hands that is really bothersome. They tend to get worse through the day and I call them my bum hands because I have the worst time opening things and I am even more clumsy than I used to be (and that's really saying something). 

By nighttime, they often throb.

Thankfully, I can still give injections, write my nurse's notes (with my special fat pen), and type, even though those things are really uncomfortable some days.

Worse than my hands is the burning in my knees. Often they burn like they are on fire all day and the pain is severe. Medication helps the discomfort but it does not come close to stopping it right now:

Finally, in the past month, the pain I have in my lower spine that radiates into my right hip has also gone from moderate to severe and uncontrolled by medication.

I have other joints that occasionally give me problems but those are the areas that are a daily major issue right now in terms of pain.

There have been several times in the past month that it has been bad enough that I have considered the emergency room for pain relief and I normally wouldn't even entertain that idea:

With the pain comes stiffness all over my body that tends to make me walk like one of Frankenstein's relatives. It is really unpleasant. :(

Another major issue that has arisen is the total and complete exhaustion that comes with this level of flare.

I have had at least one sick day per week for the past four weeks at work.

Thankfully, my employer is very understanding, but, still, I hate this.

Finally, I am extremely heat intolerant so the summer temperatures are not agreeing with me at all right now.

I've been running fever intermittently pretty much every day.

Yuck.  

Please send lots of prayers and good vibes this way that this flare will lift.

Pray that I can finish out this week at work, enjoy taking Sara to the Motion conference this weekend without getting sick, and for wisdom for my doctor at my visit on Monday.

I know there has to be a combination of meds that WILL work and I believe we WILL find it.

I just hope it is soon.

Fingers and toes crossed.